RLS (Real Life Shit) Week #2 With Succ The Zucc

[Succ The Zucc]

So for week two I'm going to describe a great story from my childhood of early June of 2008.

 

One day sometime in the early summer, my friend's uncle who just hit a dear brought it back to his house to skin and try to salvage some of the meat that was still good on it. Because it's fucking Michigan and we don't care about roadkill. Anyways, about an hour into the cutting he cut off the head and threw the head at us and said "Here go play with this" and left it at that. Being the little assholes we were, we decided to go down the street to these bible beaters (bible beaters are people who are so religious that they say kissing in public will put you in heck) who just so happen to be living on the same block as us. We then walk up to the front door of the house set the decapitated deer head on their front welcome mat and ring the doorbell and run in their neighbors bush. As the man of the house gets out he screams like a middle aged white woman would scream in a movie theater when a jump scare happened. He then yelled "Honey call the cops" we waited and waited for the cops to arrive. (It was 2008 so we said fuck it there is nothing better to do) When the cops showed up the cop in the passenger seat was leaned back presumably laughing his ass off because it looked like he was hit by the driver to calm down. When they got out the passenger was beat red, and even turned around at one point to look away. They then got a garbage bag put the head in it and threw it in the trunk and drove away. As for the family we went back to the house the next week. They had repainted their front porch and they didn't have a welcome mat.

[A Friendly Canadian]

Country Roads intensifies*

[The Herbalist]

That poor animal!